Adult SMS

ankh milaa ke ankh churaya nah kare
koi usse keh de mujhe yun tarsaaya nah kare

mein bhi akhir insan hoon mere bhi jazbat hein
chudwate hoe mujh se woh sharmya nah kare


sanmp ki maned lun khud shurakh dohoond le ga
beithne tu de durmian beshak tangein uthwaya nah kare

ooper rakh ke lun ko jo uss se mein sehlaoon
kaise mumkin hai choot woh hilaya nah kare


Jaan tu cheez hai kiya lun bhi de doon usko
shart hai roz woh niya launda pitaya nah kare

woh tu 2 bar hi chudwa ke ho jati hai mutmaen
khada ho mera teesri bar tu chor ke jaya nah kare

jo ho lal jhnadi tu gand hi marne de mujhe
meri bhi maan le kabhi apni hi manwaya nah kare

choopa tu laga leiti hai bade shauq se woh
gand marwane ke liye mintein karwaya nah kare


kabhi kabhar tu zaeqa badalne mein muzaeqa nahein.Jani
har roz tu choot apni mujh se chatwaya nah kare.

Teacher : Mahatama Gandhi Kon hai?



Pappu: Wo Ek Azeem Hero Hain,

UnhO ne Lakri Set Karne Main MUNNA BHAI ki Bohat Madad Ki Thi

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Shohar: tum meri kis chez se ziada impress ho life style,Car,Dressing ya bank balance?
Biwi: Aap k sex se,Aap jesa sex mohalle mei kisi ko karna nhi aata !

PHUDDA NEWS...
Bhosri Chok pr 1 Choot ne Khud-kush Hamla kia;
10 Lun Halaak
14 Chootein Zakhmi .
40 Mummay phat gaye .
Police ne 19 Tattay pakr liye aur 1 Lun farar aik Lun SMS parh raha hai.. aur hanstay huay soch raha hai k ye msg kis kis Lun ko frwrd krun...!
GEO News!

LUN utha k Geo!

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Pathan ki gaand py dana nikla

wo sheesha rakh k dany per dawai laga rha tha k lun khara ho gya

Pathan bola:
behnchod ka bacha
beth jao
apna hi gaand hai

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Phudi Waaste Banya LUL
Is LUL Da Sajno Koi Nai Mul

Phudi Wich Cheera Hunda
Te LUL De Utte Hunda A Phul
Is LUL Da Sajno Koi Nai Mul

Agge Piche Sukrya Rehnda
Phudi Wekh K Janda A Phul
Is LUL Da Sajno Koi Nai Mul

Fair Na Wekhe Agga Picha
Jidon Janda A Lain Te Tul
Is LUL Da Sajno Koi Ni Mul!!!

Aik super Store ke Malik ne Aik Memon Salesman ko Hire kia !!

Sales bohat ziada badh gayi..

Aik Din Maalik ne Faisla kia chup ker dekho yeh samaan sell kis tarah kerta hai..

aik admi se dealing hoti huway dekhi jo fishing rod ki price poch rha tha ...

memon salesman told its of Rs.800

uske baad salesman ne admi ke shoes dekhe aur kaha itne mehnge shoes pehen k fishing kero ge u must buy joggers..

then he said itni der dhoop mein betho ge is liye cap khareedo...

uske baad usne kaha itne der wait kero ge u must buys some dry fruits and buscuit...

then he said machli pakar ke rakho ge kaha is liye basket bhi khareedo....

ab total huway 2500...

Maalik bohat khush hua aur kaha ke woh sirf fishing rod lene aaya tha aur tumne itna kuch bech dia ...

Memon Salesman said: Sir woh tu biwi ke liye always ultra lene aaya tha mene kaha 7 din ghar mein kia karoge jakay Machli Pakro !!

Iss se zyada bhi kisi k sath ho sakta hai ..... app hi batao

Salman aik din apni wife Multani shahzadi k sath park mai baitha tha.... keh iss doran aik khubsoorat larki (Sexmeen) ne akar Multani shahzadi se kaha..
" bura mat manna laiken tairy faidy ki baat kar rahi hoo... kaam karny se pahly hi paisy lay laina.. warna yeh aadmi baad mai bahut lafra karta hai..."

Salman dear app k liye........

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Boy Friend - Tumhare Ghar Gaya Tha,
Ab Nahi Lagta Ki Apni Shadi Ho Payegi !
Ladki - Kyo ? Mere Dad Se MiLe Kyaa ?
Boy Friend - Nahi Tumhari Bahan Se !

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zindagi bhar ke liye ik nai chubhan de giya
chudai ka swaad choot ko lun de giya
bachpan se snmbhal k rakha tha jiss ko
phad ke choot JANI woh kanwarpun le giya

sex ke dauraan blue whale(male) 40 gallons sperm ke nikalta hai...

jisme se sirf 10% female k andar jata hai ..

ab apko samajh ayi baat ke samandar ka paani namkeen kio hota hai ??


Ladka apni saas se: apki beti mujhe khush nahi rakhti !

Saas: bas beta apne apne naseeb ki baat hai ..yahan tu har ladka us se khush tha !!!

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aik major ki aik sehra(desert) mein posting hoi ...

wahan usne aik camel (oont) dekha ..

pocha ke yeh camel kis liye...

soldier ne kaha sir jab humein sex ka mood hota hai tu isay istemaal kerte hein ..

aik din mahor ka sex ka mood hua tu usne camel mangwaya aik chair pe charh ke 1 ghantay tak he fucked camel .. uske baad usne kaha aese hi use kerte ho na isay tum loug ..?

soldier: nahi sir hum tu is pe beth ke pas walay gaon mein jatay hein jahan call girls rehti hain !!

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shoib malick and sania mirza sex kar rahe thy..

aik boy apni girlfriend k saath boxing match dekh rha tha ..

Boxer pehle round mein hi knockout hojata hai ..

Boy say: yeh kia bakwas hai sab kuch 1 minute mein hi khatam ..!!

Ladki : ab pata laga mujhe kesa lagta hoga !

Bubbli mini skirt mei jiju k pas aa kr boli

“jiju! Dekhye to, jhukne se mri penti dikhti hy
kya?


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Jija g: pehle penty pehn tu lo phir dekhana.

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University 55 girls trip pe Manngala dam gai,



Aur wapsi par bus mangla dam main gir gayi,



1
min bad Dam ka sara pani khusk hogiya,





Q k sari girls ALWAYS par bharosha karti theen

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Gaon ki gori.badi hi bholi.bra utaar bed pe soli. Ghaghra utha k panty kholi. Khol k panty mujhse
boli.nikal pichkari khelein holi.

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Baqi loag sonay kahan daitay hain?

Bubbli: papa nokar ne mera rape kr dya

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papa: hy! O Rabba meri beti ne

Uska kya bigara
tha?

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Bubbli: mei ne nokar aur ami ko

Sex krte huve dekh lya tha

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ek sardar ji apni behen ke sath park mein bethe hue the k samne wali building se ek admi bola
sardar ji kia behen ko chod rahe ho

sardar ji ghusse se uthe or us admi ko pakerne bhage

magar
woh admi doosri manzil se chhat per bhag gaya

sardar ji ko woh aadmi doosri manzil per nahi mila
to wapas aagae

thori der baad woh aadmi phir bola

sardar ji kia behen ko chod rahe ho

is bar
sardar ji bajae seerion ke lift se gae

magar woh seerion se necche agaya

sardar ji phir wapas
aagae

thori der baad woh aadmi phir bola sardar ji kia behen ko chod rahe ho

sardar ji ab ke
seedhe chat per gae

or is ko dhoondne lage

woh nahi mila to sardar ji neeche ki janib dekhne
lage

in ki nazar apni behen per pari to dekha k koi aadmi in ki behen ko chod raha hai

kehnne
lage k is ka qasoor nahi hai 

yahan se nazar hi aesa aata hai

2 girls were talking..

1st Girl: Yaar yeh boys apas main kaisi batain kartey hain?

2nd Girl: Wesi he jaisi hm girls karti hain..


1st girl: Uff!! Itni gandi

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A young lady 2 Doctor:
doctor mujay apney jism se bahut piyar hai
so mujay nahany se pelay kia lagana chahiye;
Doctor:
Madam aap ko nahany se pehley

Bathroom ki Kundi lagani chaye

e!!!

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Woman: Dr. sahab mujhe thode din bachha nahi chahiye.
Dr: Ye Condom le lo........
Woman: Ye pani ke sath lu ya doodh ke saath...

Dr: Kele ke saath!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Class main ek larki biskit kha rahi thi

thora kha k breziar ma chupa liya,

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Sahab: Tum bathroom mei q ghus aye,
kia tumhain pta nahi tha k main naha raha hoon?


Mulazim:
Hazur galti ho gai,

main samjha tha begum sahiba naha rahi hain

ek kusray ka pindi main kam thap hoo gaya .. us ka guru bola k to peshawar chala ja..

Suhaag raat dulha kamray mein atay bola: jaldi jaldi kapray utaro.

Biwi kapray utar ti hai ...

AFTER SEX....

Jaldi Jaldi kapray pehno...

biwi : Jaldi jaldi kio ?

husb: aray jaldi karo dulha jaega !!!!

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Jab husband honeymoon ki taiyari kar raha ho aur wife bole :

Aji sunte ho !!!!!!

Sirf SAATHI Condom lena, baaki condoms se mujhe alergy hai....

sardar jee during sucking breasts..

O baby ur breast are so nice and soft.. magar ispe nipples kio nahi hain...

Girl: Sardar jee mere hips chaatna choro ab oper ajao ..

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KIA Pyar itna Bada JUrm hai ??

Aik LAdka aur ladki apas mein bohat pyar kerte thy ... lakdi ke father ko pata chal gaya .. gussay pe qabu na rakh k usne boy ko kuch gundoun ki madad se kidnap kar lia..
aur kaha ...
Aj mein tumhe aesa sabaq sikhao ga k har pyar kerne walay k liye nishaan e ibrat ban jaega..
aur ladkay ki gardan k kareeb electric se chalne wali chain saw laya hi tha k achanak .........
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LIGHT CHALI GAYI... and ladka bola
LONG LIVE KESC !!!!!

3 Girls apni khawishaat bata rahi thi ...

First: Mera 2 hubby hoon jo subha shaam mujhe fuck karain ...

Second: mere 4 hubby hon jo poray din fucking ki shift lagayin..

Third:

Mera Aik Hubby ho ....
Jiska Chota ka Lund ho ...
Us se Mera Aik Bacha Paida Ho ...
jo Bada hoke Cricketer banay

World Cup mein Last Ball pe Jeetne k liye 1 run chahye ho ...
aur woh out hojae ...
16 corore awam bolay ...
TERI MA KO CHODUN ...!!!!

Aik Arab ne aik sexy ladki ko bar mein akele dekha

Usne usay sab se mehngi wine ki bottle send ki..

girl sends a note saying...:

tumhara yeh gift accept kerne k liye tumhare bank account mein million dollars honay chahye.. ghar mein mercedes honi chaye and pant mein 7 inches honay chahye..

Arab replied back:

mere ghar mein 10 mercedes hain..
bank account mein 20 million dollars se ziada hein..

lekin sirf tumhe chodne k liye ..

mein extra 4 inches nahi kaat sakta !!

agar ap ke legs k beech 2 balls hain it means ur a man

Agar ap k legs k beech 4 balls hain it does'nt mean ur a superman

Iska matlab hai koi apko chod rha hai !!!

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Mummy Papa ki shadi ki Video dekh k ladka bola: mein bhi apni shadi mein randiyan nachwao ga!

Mom Gusse mein : kutte woh randiyan nahi teri phuppiyan hain !!

Duniya mein aay hein tumhein chudne ke liye
ab hum tum ko yahn se chud ke hi jaaeinge

tumhein khushiyan deina hai hamra maqsad hayaat
ab tumhein lun ka aab hayaat pila ke hi jaein ge

teri choot ko soongh ke hi lun ho jata hai khada
teri choot mein hi ham ise bitha ke jaeing ge

tere liye hi hein mere paas saari sughatein
choopa lagwa ke tum ko woh de paein ge

lun mein pad jaati hai jaan tum ko dekh ke
tumhari choot mein hi iski jan niklwaein ge

Ik larki ki faryad


Uss Se Kehna


Hum Maze Me Hain


Bass........ .....


Yaad Lun ki Bohut Satati Hai


Unse Doori Ka Gham Nahi Hai Mujhe


Bass........ .....


Zara Choot Bheeg Jaati Hai

1 kunwari larki ko bacha ho gaya uss k baap ne pocha k ye kis ka bacha hai?

larki: papa dua salam sub se thi ab mein kis kis ka naam loon

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2 Pathan Couples Hunymoon k liay Gaye

2sri raat unho ne apne Partners change kr liay

4 hrs k bad

Aik Couple thak gya aur bola:
Chalo dekhte hain k...?
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Girls kia Kr rahi hain.

Before SEx....BF to GF..

Mujhe Shak hai tum Virgin nahi .. aur tumhari pussy tight nahi bht hi lose hai ..

Gf : ji nahi meri pussy bht tight hai!

bf : prove do !

gf : ok meri pussy mein aik hath dalo.. (ladka dalta hai) ab dosra haath dalo ( ladka daalta hai) ... ok ab taali bajao ...

bf : nahi baj rahi ...

gf: dekh lo kitni tight pussy hai meri ... !

ek aadmi bus ka intezaar ker raha tha
itne main ussay bhook lagi
us ne kuch kele kharide aur khaane laga
jab ek kela reh gaya tu us ki bus aa gai
us ne kela peechay ki jaib main rakh lia
thori der baad us ko khial aaya koi us ka kela nikal raha hai to
us ne kela peeche se pakar lia
thori der main peeche khare aadmi ne kaha "bhai mera stop aa gaya hai ab kisi aur ka pakar lo"

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Aurtein chudwate hoe ankhein kiun band kar leiti hein?
Guess?
?
?
??
?
?
?
-- kuch tu idea lagao

aray yaar...!!
Aurat kisi bhi haal main mard ko khush nahi dekh sakti

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Newly married couple Train se jatay huay surang se guzray.

agar mehngai ka yahi aalam raha tu:

cheeni choot say bhi zaida mehngi ho jayee gi
doodh sirf mammoon main hi reh jayee ga
pani sirf lund say hi kharij hoga
gas sirf gand say hi niklay gi
aur

current sirf tatton mainhi reh jayee ga

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Shoaib Malik:

oye yaar dakh samney wali larki k kitne barey Mummy hain,


Shahid Afridi:

Han Yaar , Barey Mammo Se yaad aya Bhabhi kasi hain?

BAAP : TUM MERI BETI SE KAB SE PYAR KARTE HO ?
LOVER : 4 MAHINE SE
BAAP : me kaise yaqin kar loo ?

Lover : thik hai 5 mahine ke baad yaqin bhi aa jayega...

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aurat kay doodh kay 5 faiday:

1) boil nahi kerna parta.
2) Billi nahi pi sakti.
3) har umer kay male ki pasand
4) khoobsurat packing main dastyab
5) aik kay sath doosra free.

Makhan Singh Ki Shadi Ho Jati Hai

Kuch Dino Baad Uss Ki Biwi Ussy Khti Hai
Mujy Ek Lakri (wood) Ka Box La Den
Makhan Singh Wo Box Ly Aata Hai Aur Uss Ki Biwi Khty Hai
Aap Ny Yh Box Kabi Bhi Nhn Kholna.

Makhan Singh Kheta Hai Theek Hai Lekin Uss Ky Dil Mein Tajasuss Peyda Ho Jata Hai Ky Uss Ki Biwi Ny Aisa Kuin Kaha

Aakhir 10 Saal Baad Wo Tajasuss Ky Haathoo Majboor Ho Ker Box Khol Deta Hai Tu Uss Mein Uss Ko 3 Andy (eggs) Aur Ek Lakh Milty Hn

Wo Apni Biwi Sy Poochta Hai Yh sub Kya Hai

Biwi= Shadi Ky Bad Mein Jab Bhi Kissi aur Murd Sy Sex Kerti Thi Tu Mein Ek Andaa Rakh Deti Thi,

Makhan Singh= Chaloo Koi Baat Nhn Tum Ny 10 Saloon Sy 3 Martaba Hi Sex Keya Hai na Koi Baat Nhn, But Yh 1 Lakh rupy Ka Kya Matlub Hai?

Biwi= Wo Jab 12 Andy Ho Jaty Hn Tu Mein Un Ko Beech Deti Thi

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Factory Employee to Boss

Mare ghar main aj 16wan bacha howa hai,

lehaza mari tankhaw barhai jaye...


Boss: Yaar mari bat sono.....


Ma APni factory chalaon k tari?

Koi leti hay Mooli tu koi Gajar
kissi ko accha lage Cucumber
koi karti hai raazi apni Leela
le ke aik mota taza lamba sa Kela
tu koi sahara leti hai baingun ka
magar choot ki aag bujhane k liye

nah mil sake ga inko mutbadal Lun ka

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Khoob mota aur lamba Lun ho
Aata chudne ka bhi Fun ho
Tu phir kiya kehne
tum hi uska singhaar
Tum hi uske gehne.

JAWANI DEVANI

mujhey milli thi woh shopping bazaar mein
khadi thi woh mere aagey ik qataar mein
zalim thi uski body aur khoob thi uski uthan
lagti thi woh koi 25 saal ki jawaan
mummey they uske bade bade
hont they uske ras se bhare
gall they uske gulabi
ankhein thein uski sharabi

garden uski patli thi
kamria uski misri ki dali thi
koolhey they uske hamwar
pehni hoi thi usne qameez shalwar
chalti thi mere dil per ik talwar
dekh kar uska joban
khada hogiya mera lun

woh thi mere agay aagey
mein tha uske peechey
peechey se kissi ne dhaka jo lagaya
mera lun uske koolhey se takraiya
rash tha bahut ho giya aur ziyada
hum sab they qataar mein pa piyada

mein ne pehna hoa tha pajama
lun ka hone laga chootron se mukalma
usne jab mehsoos kiya mere lun ko
ghusa se dekha mod ke apni gardan ko
mujh ko sharam aai per majboor tha
lun apni masti mein makhmoor tha

ab us ne koolah hilaya door hat jane ke liye
rasta mil giya lun ko uske chootron mein jane ke liye
maza tu aa rah tha sath sharam bhi ati thi
koshish ke bawajood woh aagey se hat nah pati thi
pehley tu us ne aage peechey hone ki koshish ki
phir shaed uski choot ne lun ke sath milkar shazish ki

ab usne idher udher dekha keh koi dekh tu nahein rah
dekh rahi thi woh idher udher dhian uskas aur kahein tha
kissi ka dhiyan hamari tarf nah tha usne dekha meri taraf mud ke
hole se muskarai aur kahdi ho gai meree sath aur bhi jud ke
lag ker uske chootron se lun ko hone laga ehasaas
ab woh wahn tangon mein uski karne laga masaas

dosto yeh hey ai lambi hi kahani agar ho pasand

tu mujh ko karo agah keh mein agey karon qalamband.

ab woh machalne lagi thi
-aagey peechey halne lagi thi
reshmi thi uski shalwar aur
pajama tha mera sooti
jahngiya mein bhi nahein pehna tha
aur woh bhi thi bina panty
choot thi uski bahut warm
.lun ko mil rah tha araam
ab usko aik ja nahein tha qaraar
aagey peechey ho rahi thi baar baar
lun mera ragad rah tha uski choot
uska mujh ko bhi hey iqaraar
usne dupata shaano per gira diya
aur uski oat mein hath aik pecchey kiya
choo kar mere lun ko usko pakad liya
pehly dabaya usko sehlaya aur phir
zor se jakad liya
anjan ban ke usne mere lun ko
pakar ke choot ke ooper lagaya us ke phun ko
aur phir tangon ko bheench liya
uski muthiya bhinch gai thein
aur bahon se use ne apne mumon ko jakad liya
ab tu shalwar bhi thi uski geeli
aur nazar ho gai uski nasheili
woh paseena se thi sharaboor
aur halne se bhi thi majboor
mere sath thi chipak ke lagi
achanak usne aik jharjhari li
shaed us waqt woh thi jhadi
mera tha bura haal
lun tha ab be haal
yeh sab tha loadsheding ka kamal.
ab us ne phir mera lun pakar liya
aur lagi thi use dabane aur sehlane
uski lun pe thi bari grift thi tight
keh achanak hi aagai light
mein ne hathon pe bag latka liya
istreh apna lun sab se chupa liya

ab hum doon nikle store se baher
ajnabi ban ke chal rahi woh thi bazaher
mein kaha hello aapka naam kiya hey
boli mr apko mujh se kaam kiya hey
dekho mein shadi shuda hoonh
garcheh khawand se juda hoon
mujhey esse wesse nah samjhna
nah hi essi wessi bat dil mein rakhna
mein hoon aik acchey khandan se
hum sab hi rehtey hein maan se
jo kuch bhi hoa ander woh bhula do
mera aik kamzor tha woh lamha
jis ka rahey ga sada mujh ko sadma
khuda ra uski nah mujhey saza do
.
uske dekh kar yeh rang mein tu reh giya dang
abhi tak lun tha khara aur thi us mein aik tarang
mein ne kaha dekho mein bhi admi hoon shareef
khud per kuch bhi beet jaaey kissi ko deta nahein takleef
magar aik baat meri tum maan kar
in 2 becharon per tu ehsaan kar
aur is ke liye bas rakh lo mera tel, number

kehne lagui dekho mein baat khatam karna chathi hoon
aaj ke baad tum se bhi nah mulaqat karna chahti hoon
kin do per ehsan karne ki baat karte ho
tum kiun mujh ko azmane ki baat karte ho .

mein ne kha dekho chalo hum nah milein gey kabhi
tu kiya tum in do ko bhi rakhna chahti ho ajnabi
yeh hi do tu hein mera lun aur teri choot
kiya dekhe nahein tun ne ander in ke kartoot
bas aik baar in ko milne milane do
chupne aur chupaane do
uske baad agar bolo tu kabhi nah milein gey
pata hey mujh ko aik dooje ko nah bhool sakein gey
yeh sun kar woh hans di
mein samjha woh phans gai
kene lagi woh;

tum ho aik shareef admi aur mein bhi hoon majboor
hum bhi hein shareef log yarane lagane ka nahein dastoor
mein akeli rehti hoon aur hein mere mian bahut door.
magar din mein sab rishtadaron ki bheed si lag jati hey
aur raat ko meri nand mere saath sone ko aa jati hey.
esse mein mein number le ke kiya karoongi
kissi ko pata chala tu tumhare sath mein bhi maroongi
ab mujh ko jane do mere mehman aane waley hein
khana unke liye banana hey 15-20 khane wale hein
yeh keh kar woh car mein beth gai.

mein ne phir kah accha caal nah karna number tu le lo
gar kabhi yaad aajaon tu khabar tu le lo
mein ne number likh kar usko de diya
aur apni car ki tarf hole hole chaldiya.
usne apni car start kar di thi
sachi yeh awaz tu mein ne suni thi
usne aik bar harn bajaya
mein ne dekha tu apni tarf mujhey bulaya .
boli aik mujh per ehasaan kar do
iss apne ki pehchan kara do
pajame mein jo itna achha lagta hey
dekhon tu sahi dikhne mein kitna jachta hey,
mein khara tha uski car ke darwazey ke sath
usne piyar se dekhtey hoe mujhey badhaey haath
mujh ko tu ehtbaar hi nah aaya tha
pajama ka lastic us ne sirkaya tha
lun ko nikal ke khuli akhnon se dekhne lagi
usko halaya sehlaya phir usko choomne lagi
kehne lagi tere paas tu hey essa lull
koi bhi dekh le tu ho jaey pagal
6 mah se mein ne lun ko nah chooa nah dekha
kiya kahoon kitni buri hey meri rekha
ander jo bhi hoa yeh lun lene ki hasrat thi
lun tere ki chubhan se hoi mujhey mussarat thi
ab mein bhi poori try karoongi
mauqa nikal isko choot mein dharoongi
raat ko hoti hey mere pass meri nand
uska bhi kissi treh karna pare ga munh band
jab bhi hoa mein tum ko fon karoongi
ab nah liya choot mein tu maroongi
kab tak ungliun se mein gazara karongi
accha ab tum jaao mujhey kuch hone laga hey
koi aa nah jaey yeh aane jane ki jaga hey
mein tum ko jald hi phone kar ke bulaongi
kar lo NADIA ka yaqeen apne JIMMI ko nah tarsaongi.

doosrey din usko phone aa giya
raat ko usne tha mujh ghar tha bulaya
mein ne lun ko di thapki aur kah munney
tiyar ho ja khane ko halwa poori aur channey.

KURRI(GIRL)

Assan jaan ke meet lai akh vay
jhooti moothi da pa leiya ei kakh vay
tu chak le assdi latt vay
thuk la ke phddi ute rakh vay
hole hole lun dhak sajna
Assan tere kulon hun nahein sangna

MUNDA(BOY)

Chuk liti teri tang nii
lah diti teri sang nii
phuddi teri tang lun jaay ruk ruk sajna
Assan tere kulon kadha sangna

KURRI

Iss di tangi di nah kar parwah vay
aape deve gi lun noon rah vay
te tu zora zori dhak sajna
Assan tere kulon hun nahein sangna

MUNDA

Treile teri phut gai ey
baddal hun rutt gai ey
tillak tillak ke janda ey
lun maze peya panada ey
duhara ho gaya tera lukk sajna
Assan tere kulon kadha sangna

KURRI
Meinoon maza bara aanda ey
jadoon lun phuddi icch janda ey
iss noon aan de iss noon jaan de
hun nah iss noon dakk sajna
Assan tere kulon hun nahein sangna

MUNDA

Hont tere gulabi
baniya mein sharabi
navey tey nakorey
mumey tere gorey
tu inahn noo nah dhak sajna
Assan tere kulon kadha sangna

KURRI

Dhake te maar dhakkey
chudda de mere chakkey
teri bahawan icch lukdi
meri jaan pae mukdi
zor di maar sutt vay
lehaz mera nah rakh sajna
Assa hun tere ku lon nahein sangna


MUNDA

Eih lun da maidan ey
phuddi icch iss di jaan ey
raj raj te reejahn lah ke chude da
chudai di iss noon bhukh sajna
Assan tere kulon kadha sangna

KURRI
Maza aaya ang ang
mein te reh gai dang
mein suhi laal ho gai
mein paseeno paseeno
haal tu be haal ho gai
tere lun dita essa rang sajna
Asaan tere kulon hun nahein sangna

MUNDA
Maza tun paya sawad tenoon aaya
tun kal vi avein te nava maza pavein
apna qaul te qarar nibhavien
rang vich nah pavein bhang sajna
Assan tere kulon kadha sangna

KURRI
Mein roz roz awangi
mool nah sharmanwangi
nit navan maza pawangi
tu chudien meino isse dhang sajna
Assan tere kulon hun nahein sangna

MERA DIL PHIR KARE
PHUDI WICH LUN VARE
CHAK LE PHIR MERI TANG
METOON MOLON NAH SANG
RANG LE APNE RANG SAJNA
ASSAN TERE KULON KADHA SANGNA.

Soongh Kar Pata Chalta Hai

Ek Patni Apne Pati Se Puchti Hai: “Suno Ji In Kutton Ko Kaise Pata Chalta Hai Ki Kutiya Ka Mann Ker Raha Hai?”
Pati: “Unhe Soongh Kar Pata Chalta Hai”

Patni Gusse Se Boli: “To Bhonsdi Ke Tujhe Jukaam Hai Kya?“

Kal tak jo thay hum se ajnabi
pehle mille nah thay hum se kabhi
aaj wahi hamari sejj sajjay beithe hein

hum gae thay kal ik kaam se bazar
wahein per woh takra gay nazar hoi chaar
tab se wohi hawaas per chaay beithe hein

dekh ke unki mardana shakhshiyat
maaeil ho gai un pe hamarii tabiyat
ankhein ab hum rah mein bichaay beithe hein

hoi thein jaab itefaqun nazrein chaar
hum tu beithe apna sab kuch haar
hogae hum tu ooper neeche se geelay
bhag ke pakdi bas ho ke sharmashar
phir bhi unke hi khiyal uljhaay beithe hein

jo laga bas ko jhtka koi mujhe se aa chimta
kamar se us ne pakda chootdon per uska tika
tha tu kissi ka woh lauda magar lagta tha hathoda
maza agia jab socha wohi mujhe liptaay beithe hein


dekha jo mud ke ussi ko apne sath lage paya
khushi hoi dekh ke woh mere tha peeche aya
pakar ke uss ne ik muma sagoshi ki
kiya le loon mein chutki acchi si
sun ke hum muskra diye kuch keh nah sake
uss ne jo diya hath mein tu reh gai hake bake
ussi lamhe ko hum khiyalon mein basaay beithe hein

itne mein aa giya hamara stop mein utar padi
woh bhi aayga peeche thi hamein umeed badi
dekha tu tha woh bhi pichle darwaze se utar aaya
dil mein khushi k ladu phoote choot mein pani utar aaya
tab se hi hum masti mein muskaay beithe hein

dekha jo mud ke woh peecha kar rah tha
dar rahe thay hum dil dhak dhak kar rah tha
gali ke mod per hum khare hoe uske intezar mein
jaldi se uss ne le liya hamein bahon ke hissaar mein
rakh deiye uss ne humare lubon per lub
soch liya chudwa ke rahein ge unse ab
hum ne kah koi dekh le ga yahan
poochne lage phir kahn
chalte ho tu chalo hamare haan
akele hein hum koi aur nahein wahan
darwaz band karte hein uss ne hamein gira liya
utha ke tangein hamari lun choot per tika diyaa
choot tu pehle hi thi geeli ban gai thi samandar
maze se khilne lagi usne jab rakha apna machandar
zalim ne ik zor ka jhatka laga k kar diya sara andar
uss waqt se hum hosh ganwaay beithay hein

hum ne kah oh Dilbar oh mere jani
thora hole dhake lagao karo itni mehrbaani
choot tu ban gai tumhare laude ki aashiq
aur hum hein aaj se app ki raani
yun hum ik dooje mein samaay beithe hein

Kal tak jo thay hum se ajnabi
pehle mille nah thay hum se kabhi
aaj wahi humari sejj sajjay beithe hein

Kehte thay sab usko Pinki
aur kehlata tha mein Brown

nah thi woh meri maan jaai
phir bhi samajhta tha usko behn
aur woh bulati thi mujhe jani bhai
pass hi tha uska ghar
woh thi meri hamsaai

usko laga tha ab atharwan saal
jawani ne kiya tha uska bura haal
raat ko neend nah ati usko
aur din mein rehti thi be-haal

jab bhi woh hamare ghar aati
Jani bhai keh ke mere gale lag jati
mere seene se laga deiti apna joban
aise mein khada ho jata mera lun

mein peeche hat jata akher thi meri behn
kehti bhai sath lagne do ata hai mujhe chain
darta tha mein koi khata nah kar beithon
apni piyari behn ko khafa nah kar beithon

dil tu chahta tha yun hi gale mere lagi rahe
chanmbeli ki bail ki treh mujh se chimti rahe
magar dra deiti thi mujhe uski jawaani
qurb mein ho sakti thi mujh se nadani

ammi kehti hans k bhai behn kabhi yun mila karte
log dekh kar aise gandi batein kiya karte hein
woh kehti choro amma logon ko kehne do
mujhe tu mere bhai ki bahon mein rehne do

mein hon iski behn yeh mera bhai jani
bhala koi kiun soche, karein ge hum nadani.

itne mein mein chala jata kamre ke andar
aur woh sunti rehti ammi jan ka lecture

koshish uski hoti keh mera dil lubhaay
kai bar bahane se usne apne mumay dikhay
bra nah pehnti thi kabhi qameez ke neeche
aur chalati thi teer apni nazron ke teekhe

beith ti thi istreh mujhe nazar ata uski choot ka ubhar
dekh ke kahda ho jata lun mera , hojata mein sharmassar.

kai baar jab mein college se ghar aaya
usko mein ne sota apne bed par paya
jagata mein usko hilata mein usko
angrai le ke uthte har bar mujhe tarpaya

kehti arre tum kab aay .aay ho tu yahein aa jaao
so jao mere sath aur mujh mein sama jaao

mein kehta chal be sharam kuch tu sharam rehne de
akher hum behn bhai hein kuch tu bharam rehne de

hanste hoe uthti choom ke mere gaal chali jati
kar ke istreh woh mera bura haal chali jaati

kabhi chuti ke din jab mein soya hota
ussi ke khawabon mein khoya hota
ammi ke khene per woh aati mujhe jagane
dekh ke pajamay ka ubhar lagta dil uska lluchane

beth jati bed per aur pherti mere balon mein ungliyan
garam sansein uski chahat ki kha rahi hoti chugliyan
uske hath khelte mere seene k balon se
aur woh mila leiti apne rukhsar meri galon se

mein sota bana rehta aur uska hath choo lita mere lun ko
aur mehsoos karta uski sanson ki uljhan ko

jag uthta mein aur kehta mein usko
arre kab aai tum ab uthne de mujh ko

mein khud nahein aai ammi ne bheja tum ko jagane ke liye
nashta tiyar hai bhai ab aa jao khane ko

kab tak bana rahoonga mein jani anjaan
dil karta hai chud loon jab bhi woh kehe bhai jaan

ghar ki baat ghar mein rehegi koi shak bhi nah kare ga
chud chud ke behn ko dil kabhi nah bhare ga

issi treh jo karein behnein bhaiun ko seduce
bhaiun ko kar sakti hein behnein madhosh.

ik din Pinki aur Brown ka hoga milaap
chudai karein ge je bhar ke nah lage ga paap

1 Pakistani wife English wife say: Aap din me kiya kerti hain?

Eng Wife:
swimming
Driving
Eating
Sleeping

or aap?
Asi jee,
Din sara chullay pe
or
raat sari lullay pe.

__________________________

Admi Malang se: Baba ji meri B.V Bara tang kerdi ay koi hal daso?

Malang: Puttar koi hal hunda tay main malang hunda..

_________________________

Flat ki ghanti baji

andr se awaz ayi KON?

Cable wala:Iss mahine ka bill leny aya hon

larki: Baad ma aah aah aa aaahna, abhi DUDH waly ka bill de rehi hon.

_____________________________

Nargis Ghoray ki sawari ker k wapsi aai tu Ghoray wala bola:

Madam Ghora bohut khush ha..

Nargis:

Meri taangon k beech jo b aata ha khush he rehta ha...

________________________________

Judge:
Khan sab tum ne S.H.O ki izzat kiyon loti?

khan:
judge sahib, S.H.O ney hum ko hukam diya tha k "HATHIYAAR DAAL DO" tu buss hum ne b daal diya.....

___________________________

Class main teacher ne keha jo stupid ha woh khara ho gaye

Ik bacha khara ho gaya

Teacher , tum stupid ho?

Student: nahi miss app akeeli khari theen to mujy acha nahin laga.

_____________________________

Jab tak choot pe lun nah dhare koi
aise piyar muhabbat ko kiya kare koi

lun ho mota lamba taza tu choot bhi Dasi
chota dheela ho tu reh jati hai choot hi piyasi
aise mein piyar ka dam kiya bhare koi

nain naqs hoon khoobsorat gudraya badan
haq hai mile un ko mota pala playa Lun
tu har waqt kiun nah muskarya kare koi


aur jo niklein Khudanakhasta naseeb khote
shadi unse ho jin ke lun hoon piplay chote
phir hamsaay ko bhai keh kr bulaya kare koi


chudne se pehle jo karein piyari batein
dein biviun ko apne boson ki sughatein
kaise nah unse piyar jitaya kare koi


aur phir jo karein chudai tikaa kar
andar baher karein injar pinjar hila kar
Dasi ban ke kaise nah unki sewa kiya kare koi


ho jate hein jo do chaar jhatkon mein Khlaas
unko hota nahein doosron ke jazbat ka paas
aise mein kaise thandi aah nah bhra kare koi



Jani piyar mast chudai ka hi doosra naam hai
jin ka ho kaam accha, unko chooton ka salam hai
kash har kissi ko khushiyan diya kare koi

~~Dr.Faisal With Riya Malik~~



Riya = Dr Mujy Morning Sy Bhut Ziyada Khaansi Ho Rahi Hai

Dr.Faisal = (Check Kerty Hwy) Saans Lyin, Zor Sy, Aur Zor Sy

Achanak Katak Ki Awaz Ayi
Dr. Faisal = Lagta Hai Aap Ki Passli Toot Gayi Hai

Riya = Kaminy Meri Bra Toot Gayi Hai

___________________________________

Pota: Dada G, ye condom kia hota hy...???
Dada: chal hatt mjy nai pata.
Pota: mjy pata tha budhy tujy nai pata, agar tujhy pata hota tu aaj jaeydad k 18 tukry na hoty...!!!

After suhagraat :Hubby apni biwi se : raat ko maza aaaya ?


Wife : haan aur aap ko ?
Hubby ha muje bhi bahot mazaa aaya......

Wife : aata kyon nahi aaj tak kisi ki bhi koi complaint nahi aayi...

________________________________

Aurat bachy k sath khilono ki shop k pas se guzri
Bacha zid krne lga k khilona lena hay.
AURAT: Khan sab! Zara isko darao Zid krta hay.

KHAN: Oye!
Madarchod,
Randi ka bacha
Hm tumra maa ko Lun dega
Hrami ki olad!
Maa ka kuss
Zidd na kro
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Bas MERA BEHAN . . !
or draya to roay ga...

Santa to Banta: Yaar meri biwi kabhi kabhi mere jhaant ke baal khinchti hai!!!

Banta: Usko saja do......jis din khinche us din us ko 2 baar aage,

2 baar doggy style,
2 baar kharae,
2 baar muhn main,
2 baar baitha ke,
2 baar gand main.......achhe se shot maaro.

Santa : Bhosrike, saza use deni hai yaa mujhe?

______________________________

Sardar Ji Apni Shadi Ki 1st Night Room Main Enter Howe To Light chali Gai

Sardar Ji Sari raat Darwaze Pe Khary Rhy


Suba Dost Ne Pocha :

Sunao sardar ji Raat Kasi Guzri......?


Sardar: Ki Dassan Sari Raat Bijli Udeek Da Reya Wan.. K Bijli Awey Te Light Buja K Kundi lawan........

_______________________________

aik pathan lerki chodnay gaya, jab paisay denay laga tu us ki naika kehnay lagi k yeh note tu buhut purana horaha hai naya note laoo
pathan wapis chala gaya doosray din aaya tu us kay pass naya note tha lerki lay ker kamray main chala gaya thori dair baad lerki kay chekhnay ki awaz aai tu naika gai aur poocha "kya hua?
lerki boli yeh meri naaf main dalnay ki koshish ker raha hai
pathan bola jab note naya diya hai tu ham soorakh bhi nai jaga karay ga.

Raat ho chuki thi
1 darkht ki shakh pe 1 chutia bulbul lun jesa mu bana k betha hua tha
Wahan se ek jugnu ka guzr hua
Usne bulbul se pucha: Bhosri k abi tk ghar nhi gya, yahan kya gand marane klye betha hy?

Bulbul tarap k bola:
Kus k dhakan, tu ne to gand me UPS fit krwa rkha hy
hmare ghar light nhi hy

Kal Meri Birth Day Thi.....

Meri Biwi Ny Mujy Wish Nhn Keya Aur Na Hi Mere Bachoo Ny

Mein office Chalaa Gaya, But Mere Dostoo Ny Bhi Mujy Wish Nhn Keya,
Mein Apny Cabin Mein Mein Aa Gaya,
Meri Secretry Ny Kaha = Happy Birth Day Sir
Mujy Bhut Acha Laga, Phir Uss Ny Mujy Flat Py Invite Keya,
Hum Uss Ky Flat Mein Aa Gaye,

& She Said= Mein 2 Mint Ky Leye Bed Room Mein Chali Jaun?
I Said= Ok

Kuch Waqt Ky Bad Wo Bhut Bary Cake Ky Sath Bahir Ayi, Uss Ky Peechy Mere Biwi , Bachy, Aur Dost Bhi Thy, Jo Happy Birth Day Aur Surprize Ka Shor Machaa Rahy Thy

Aur Mein Apni Secretry Ky Intzaar Mein Sofy Per Nanga Betha Tha

A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast.
"You aren't so good in bed either!" he shouted and stormed off to work.
By midmorning, he decided he'd better make amends and phoned home. After many rings, his wife picked up the phone.
"What took you so long to answer?"
"I was in bed."
"What were you doing in bed this late?"
"Getting a second opinion."

Couple was pumping hard in the bed

Couple was pumping hard in the bed.
MAN: Spread your legs wider honey...wider....wider!
GIRL: Are you trying to get your balls in?
MAN: Nooo, trying to get them out!

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I have lost my wife here in this supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"
"Why?" the woman asked.
"Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife appears out of nowhere."

Girl to boy: Shaadi k liye konsi date rakhien??

Boy: 22 december

Girl: Koi khaas wajah?

Boy: haan, Saal ki sabse lambi raat isi date ko hoti hai..

Larki (apni maan se): aj rasty mein kuch logon ne mera rape kar diaMaan: hai mein mar gae, ab to too pregnant ho jaey gi.Larki: don't worry maan, wo log pathan thay!!!

Girl Asked Plastic surgeon


2 make another hole near her ass


surgeon was surprised and asked why?


girl: Business is gud so opening a new branch "

A soldier marries & his wife has periods the same day.
He writes to the camp " red alert in the front,
extend leave". He gets the reply:
"attack from the back and come back"

Ek aurat hote hey us ke bubbe (BooBs) bade hote hain jab bhi wo ghar se bahar kam ke liye jati to gali ke bache chilate hain "ye aam hain kitne pyare pyare ye aam hain kitne pyare pyare"

To wo Apne husband ko batati hai aur wo ek din us ke sath jata hai to bache chilana shuro kerte hain "ye aam hain kitne pyare pyare ye aam hain kitne pyare pyare"

Shoher buhat ghusse main aajata hai aur Shalwar utaar ker lora nikal ke bolta hey

"Aao tehni hilao, jitne gire tumhare"

Pati - Aaj subah na jaane kis ka muhn dekh kar utha tha ki din ka khana
nasib nahi hua.

Patani - Meri mane to bedroom me lage aaine ko hata do varana rojana yahi sikayat rahegi.

Pati - Aaj subah na jaane kis ka muhn dekh kar utha tha ki din ka khana
nasib nahi hua.

Patani - Meri mane to bedroom me lage aaine ko hata do varana rojana yahi sikayat rahegi.

Me: Urdu me topless ko kya kehte hai ?
you: pata nahi yaar .. aap hi bata do
Me : Khule-aam

Bush (pathan se): tum ham ko Osama do ham tum ko Titanic wali larki day ga.
Pathan: ham tum ko Osama day ga par hamein Titanic wali larki nai larka chaheay...

larka larki say: Mattak mattak ker chalti ho, kia maar dalo gi
thori si day do kia achaar dalo gi?
larki larkay say: Mattak mattak kay chulti hon meri chaal hi aisi hay
Apni behun ki lay lo hum dono ki aik jaisi hay

1 Chohdry Manji khreed k Wapis ghar ja rha tha raste main usey 1 Admi mila
1 admi: Ch Saab kidron aa re je?
Ch: Manji le k.
1 Admi: Kine di ae?
Ch: 2000 di.
1 Admi: Ch Saab tusi te bund he marwa ae je.
Agey 2sra Admi mila Usne b ye he swal kiya.
Ch: 1000 di.
2 Admi: Ch Saab tusi te bund he mrwa ae je.
Agey 3sra Admi mila us ne pocha Ch Saab kidron aa re o?
Ch Ghusse se: Bund mrwa k.
Admi: Manji Naal le gae so?

Larka tumhari khubsuriti ka raz kiya hai ...Larki Lux Soap
Larka kamal hai meri kamzori ka bhi yahi raz hai.

Sardar jee ja rhy rasty main achanak kutta par gya ...


sardar ne jaldi se apni dhoti utar k kutty ki taraf phank di....


Friend: dhoti kion utari?


Sardar: oney v laa ee lani c!

Officer: Tumhy Airhostes ne Thapar Q mara?

Sardar: uski Qamiz hip mai ghusi the, maine bahir nikali to vo ghusy sy
dekhny lagi.

O:Phir?

Sardar:Maine wapis ghusa de,

Aik bus mai heejra(gay) baitha howa tha . us k peechy aik larka aur aik old man baithy howy thay.
us larkay ne heejry ko peechy se gaand mai ungli di...
Heejry nay peechy old man ke taraf daikh k kaha..
" Q miss call day rahay ho app "
old man nay jaldi se apni qameez ko samny se uthaya aur apny ????? ki taraf ishara kartay howay kaha..
" bhai mairy paas to pechly 3 salo(years) se balance hi nahi hai "

1. Mera peecha matt kero.
2. Mein shareef larki hoon.
3. Bus aik baar boloon gi I Love You.
4. Sirf aik baar miloon gi.
5. Kuch kerna nahi.
6. Koi dekh lay ga.
7. Bus ouper say ker lo, neechay haath bhi na lagao.
8. Panti matt uttaro.
9. Bus aik baar hi kerwaoon gi.
10. Sharam aa rahi hai.
11. Bohat lamba hai.
12. Mein itna mota nahi lay sakti.
13. Zor say matt daalna.
14. Bohat dard ho raha hai.
15. Boobs ko chooso.
16. Kamar ko pakkad ker daalo.
17. Zor say dhakka maaro.
18. Uff! Kitna mazza aa raha hai, ab bahir matt nikalna.

QUESTION: Burnt toast aur pregnant Girl friend mein konsi cheez mushtareka hai
ANSWER: In dono cases mein larka sochta rehta hai ,Do second pehle nikal liya hota to kitna acha hota'

SeXXXmeen= Jab Bhi Tumhin Call Kero Tu Koi Aur Tumhara Phone Attand Kerta hai Aur Hamsha Yhi Khata hai tum Busy ho Aur Shiv Bana rahy Ho, Aakhir Tum Din Mein Kitni Martaba Shiv Kerty Ho?

BALI= 30 Sy 40 Martaba Tu Kerta Hun

SeXXXmeen = 30 Sy 40 Martaba Kya Tum Pagal Ho?

BALI= Nhn Mein NAAI Hun

Talwaar baazi ke mukaablay mein aik Chinese ne baarik taar ke do tukray kar diye.

Japani ne us say bhi baarik taar ke tukray kar diya.

Pakistani ne machar urraya, Talwaar ghumayi aur machar urrh gaya.

Judge ne poocha,

Machar to urrh gaya,

To us ne kaha ke urrh to gaya,

Par kabhie Baap nahi ban sake ga..!

A girl to his boy friend...

Kia tum mere liye Farhaad ki tarha dhood ki nahrein nahi nikaal sakte?

Boy: Kyu nahi tum zara apne nippal mere hath me do

A lady was advised urine test,
and her sample got mixed up by mistake.
Her doctor told her that she was pregnant.
Oh no,she cried,we can´t even trust the candles now!

FIRST MAN: my wife is obsess with cars.
While asleep, she holds my dick & say 'Ferari,Porsche...'
SECOND MAN: mine is worse,
she puts my bird inside her & say 'Full Tank please!'

Penis & Balls are arguing.
Balls: Hey, U are very unfair!
Everytime you go in you never bring us along,
only you enjoy! Penis: Eh, U think its fun?
I always keep vomiting!

Ek lady dukandar se puchti hai
BHAYYA ISS SUIT KA RANG TO NAHI JAYEGANA?
Dukandar jo totla tha bolta hai,
MADAM AAPKA CHUT FAT JAYENGA LEKIN LAND NAHI NITLENGA.

Text messaging is like a blow-job

Text messaging is like a blow-job,
off an amateur prostitute;
short...sweet and always cheap!!!

boy to girl: kya may aap ka haath choom sakta hoon?

girl: q? meray honton pay kaantay lagay hain kya???

Did u know meaning of WOMEN?
"W"ant
"O"ne
"M"an for
"E"very
"N"ight

A boy was fingering a girl,

girl: yeh kia ker rahay ho?

boy: plot may khudai ker raha hoon!

girl: khudai may bhi ker sakti hoon, tum pillar lagao

Teacher: Sab se ziada calcium kis doodh main hota hai?

Boy: Jawan larki ke dhood me, kiu ke is pe moo lagao to jism k un hison me bhi jaan aa jati hai jin mein haddi nahi hoti...

Larki ne Major Rohail se lift mangi raaste mei uske tbeat kharab ho gye. Major usy hospital le gya.

Dr. bola aap baap ban ne wale hen.

MAJOR KO TENSION: Woh bola mei iska baap nhe!

Phir Lrki se pucha, Woh boli

Yahee is bache ka bap hy

MAJOR KO PHIR TENSION

Pher police Aai

Major ka medical checkup hua

Report I k Mojar Rohail kbe bap nhe bn sakta

Us ne KHUDA ka shukar ada kya.

Khushi khushi bahar aaya.

OR PHIR

Socha k Jo 4 bache ghar pe hein

WO KIS K HEN?

PHIR TENSION.

Whats d diffrence between foreigner n Pakistani?after 2 peg of whisky,
foreigner says gud nyt swt dreamz..
But pakistani says o behan k lodo ab batao kis ki ma chodni hai.

A man was doing sex with his girlfriend,, unfortunately condom slipped into her.

After some days news paper flashed a news a baby BORN WITH LAMINATION!!!!!

Teacher: macharon ko peda hoone se rokna hoga.

Student:ye to na mumkin hai.

Teacher:kuon?

Student:itna chota condom kisi ka baap nhi bana sakta..!

Is Say Ziada aur kya bura HO MUNDAA
Us nay Shalwar Pehn li mera Khara Kar Kay?

Hai bahut husein magar ban gai jaan ka wabbaal
chudwate hoe kehti hai banda hai tu baakamal

mein hoon insaan woh samjhti hai mujhe kuch aur
8inch ka andar dalwa ke kehti hai saara daal

ik bar nahein do bar nahein teen teen bar
mein chud chud ke usse hoon ho jata nidhaal

pakad leithi hai aur phir utha leiti hai lun ko
jab uthta hai uski choot mein niya ubbaal

thak ke so bhi jaaon tu jagay rakht hai mera lun
mujhe hai chudna aur usse hai chudwana behrhaal

Aansuo ke girne ki aahat nahi hoti,
Chut ke seal tootne ki awaaz nahi hoti,
Agar hota Lund ko ehsaas dard ka,
to use dard dene ki Aadat nahi hoti..

ladki boli 200 Lungi,
or hil hil kar k dungi....
ladka bola 100 hi don ga,
hil mein khud hi loon ga.....
ladki bali 100 bhi bacha lay,
apne hath sey hi hila lay....

KHIYALON KA SAFAR

bas yah mujh ko tum se kehna hey
tere dil mein mein ne rehna hey

gar ho ijazat tu tere lubon ko choom loon
teri zulfon se khelon masti mein jhoom loon

teri ankhon mein doob kar kahein kho jaaon
ji karta hey hamesha ke liye tera ho jaaon

Terre honton ko chooson mummon se kheloon
teri tangon mein rahoon teri choot ko sehlaaon

agar tum maan jao tu piyar kar lein gey
lun aur choot aik doojey se iqrar kar lein gey

jab bhi mein tanha hota hoon
sirf tujhey hi mein sochta hoon

dheere dheere teri zulfien kholta hoon
hathon ke katore mein tera chand chera le kar
khamoshi ki zaban mein tujh se bolta hoon

hole hole tere kapde utarne lagtey hein
tere jism se mere hath khelne lagtey hein
tere lubon,nipples mumon,ko choosta hoon
hath laga kar teri choot se mein poochta hoon

bolo meri jaan ab tumhara kiya khiyal hey
pinki choot hey geeli mera lun shurkh laal hey

sharma kar tum meri bahoon mein aa jati ho
aur pir tum meri sanson mein sama jaati ho

mujhey apne ooper khench leti ho tum
mere lun ko tangon mein bhench leti ho tum

jab lun choot se ja kar milta hey
ik sakoon ankhon se teri jhalkta hey

tango ko apni kuch istreh phela leti ho
bin kahey lun ko tum ander bula leti ho

kar deti ho mujh per kuch essa jadoo
keh lun per nahein rehta mere qaboo

woh kabhi aage kabhi peechey ata hey jaata hey
tere choot ki andheri gali mein yun chakar lagata hey

hum donon ke dil ki dharkanein badh jati hein
aur teri tangein meri kamar per chadh jati hein

har dhake per teri siskiyan sunai deti hein
tere nazrein meri nazron ki balaein leti hein

chudai mein mast hum sab kuch bhool jatey hein
paseene mein humare saans bhi phool jatey hein

lun ab piyar se choot ko kharaj paish karta hey
maza de de kar choot ko khud bhi aish karta hey

choot muskra kar yun lun ka tuhfa leti hey
juice apna bhi lun ke juice mein mila leti hey.

tumhara jism dheela ho jata hey
aur rang bhi peela ho jata hey

ankh milate bhi tum sharmati ho
mere seena mein chera chupati ho

yun hum aik doosrey mein kho jatey hein
aik doojey ke sath lipat ke hum so jatey hein

YAHI MUJH KO KEHNA THA
YAHI MUJH KO KEHNA HEY

WHY GIRLS DONT MARRY SOFTWARE ENGINEERS ??????

Wife - would you like to have some snacks?
Husband - hard disk full.

Wife - have you brought the saree.
Husband - Bad command or file name.

Wife - but I told you about it in morning
Husband - erroneous syntax, abort, retry,cancel.

Wife - hae bhagwan !forget it where's your salary.
Husband - file in use, read only, try after some time.

Wife - at least give me your credit card, i can do some shopping.
Husband - sharing violation, access denied.

Wife - i made a mistake in marrying you.
Husband - data type mismatch.

Wife - you are useless.
Husband - by default.

Wife - what is my value in your life?
Husband - unknown virus detected.

Wife - do you love me or your computer?
Husband - Too many parameters.

Wife - i will go to my dad's house.
Husband - program has performed an illegal operation,it will close.

Wife - I will leave you forever.
Husband - close all programs and log in again

Aik Larki coca cola ki botal penay kay liay mou kay qarib lati hay us kay andar say aik machar(mosqito) nikal ata ha. Larki usko marnay lagti ha tu machar us kay kan may kuch kahta ha or wo larki us ko chore thay ti ha.
Batao us nay larki say kia kaha
.

.

.

wo Kahta ha may tumhari coke say nikla ho.

________________________________

Shoher suhag raat ke baad apni biwi se:

Jaan raat ko kuch maza aaya?

Biwi: Aap ko aaya?

Shoher: Bohot.

Biwi: Dekh lein aaj tak kisi ko shikayat ka moqa nahi diya…

________________________________

Ek 16 saal ka ladka sanyasi ban gaya,
Maa rote hue-Hai! mere bache ne to abhi duniya bhi nahi dekhi thi.
Pados wali bhabhi boli: chinta mat karo maine DIKHA DI THI.